The Bradys Toke Up
by BalletPrincess
Summary: The once innocent Brady kids, are now the dope-smokin Brady teens.
1. The Bradys Toke Up

The Bradys Toke Up:  
  
Note: I don't own the Brady characters. I only own the storyline. I figured they'd eventually get into the stuff. it WAS the 70's afterall.  
  
Greg and Marcia Brady sat in up Greg's attic room. No one suspected a thing, of course, because Greg was the grooviest senior at Westdale High and Marcia the most popular Junior. Things may have changed, however, if they knew what was really going on.  
  
With the door closed and the windows open, Greg took a drag from his joint.  
  
  
  
"Ahhh, nothing like relaxing" he said  
  
Marcia nodded, as she took a few hits off her own bong. "Suuuure thing, Greg."  
  
Greg and Marcia had been smoking pot together for quite some time. It all began the year before when Doug Simpson, a former rival and now friend of Greg's had given him a sample.  
  
"Just try it out, man, it will loosen you up."  
  
So nervously, Greg tried the stuff. Naturally he loved it, so he continued to buy it off Doug, who grew the shit in his backyard. He wanted to share the joy, so he told his best friend in the world, his stepsister Marcia. The two now spent almost every afternoon together, toking up in Greg's room.  
  
That particularly sunny day, Greg was laying on his bed and Marcia on throw pillows, listening to some groovy tunes and smoking their cares away. All of a sudden though, Marcia heard footsteps.  
  
"What's that?" she asked Greg  
  
"What's what?"  
  
"The noise. is someone coming?"  
  
Greg paused. "Nahhhh.."  
  
But someone was coming. Jan's blond head appeared at the top of the stairs.  
  
"Hey guys.what's.." Jan sniffed the air. "What the fuck. is that Mary Jane I smell?"  
  
Marcia got up. "Jan. please just don't tell Mom and Dad, okay?"  
  
Jan grinned. "No prob, sis. You just gotta share the wealth."  
  
"What????" Asked Greg "You're into this too?"  
  
Jan nodded. "Yep. haven't you noticed that I've changed?'  
  
"I just thought it was those anti-depressants you said you were on."  
  
Jan laughed. "Marijuana is my anti-depressant, man!"  
  
"Well pop a squat!" invited Greg.  
  
"Wait," said Jan "Let me get Pete. He's into the stuff, too you know."  
  
"No!" said Greg, "Really?"  
  
"Are Cindy and Bobby into it too?" asked  
  
Jan laughed. "Are you kidding? The still think cigarettes are nasty."  
  
Marcia smiled. "At least we haven't corrupted them yet!"  
  
"Eh, just give them a few years" said Greg.  
  
So Jan went downstairs to find Peter. As the four kids sat around Greg's room getting jazzed, Mike and Carol were downstairs, helping Alice get ready for dinner. At 6:00, the time the Bradys always ate, Carol noticed that only Bobby and Cindy were at the table.  
  
"Where IS everyone?" asked Carol  
  
"I think I saw Jan go up to the attic," said Cindy who had lost her lisp (thank God-- she was in 6th grade already)  
  
"I'll go call them." Said Mike  
  
"Mike?" Carol whispered "What do you think the four of them are doing up there? It is time for dinner."  
  
Mike gave Carol a knowing look. He then barged up the stairs and called up to the attic. "Greg, Marcia, Peter, Jan! Dinner."  
  
As the four kids came down, completed wasted on some pretty dank pot, Mike noticed something odd. So he said, "But first, into Jan's room. All of you."  
  
"Well kids, I knew this would happen sooner or later, and I guess it's sooner. I know what you've been up to."  
  
"Shit" whispered Greg, as Marcia and Jan gave each other genuinely scared looks.  
  
"I know what you've been doing, at it's wrong, even though it may not feel that way. And it's going to stop right now."  
  
"Sir," began Peter  
  
"Just a minute, Peter. Kids, I know that having siblings so close in age can be tempting. Especially since you really aren't blood related. However, in this family, we don't feel that you ought to behave in such a way. It isn't healthy for our family relations."  
  
The look on the kids faces clearly said, "What the fuck?"  
  
"I'm not going to ask how much has happened, I'm only hoping that these little "incidents" haven't progressed beyond kissing. However, if they have, I don't want to know. I just want it to stop. There are plenty of other available teens out there for you, please limit your sexual activities to outside the Brady home. Clear?"  
  
Relieved, the four kids responded with "Clear."  
  
The five Bradys then trooped downstairs for dinner. They were off the hook- for now. 


	2. The Stash is Discovered

Chapter Two: The Stash is Discovered  
  
It was a sunny day, as usual in Brady world. The kids had the day off from  
school, and Greg was up in his attic pad taking hits off his pipe and daydreaming about Marcia. He dreamed of getting her fucked up and screwing the crap out of her. But for now, he settled for masturbating while smokin'  
bud.  
  
All of a sudden, Greg saw someone appear at the top of the stairs. He  
frantically zipped up his groovy white bell bottom pants, completely forgetting that he was still holding his pipe and that his room reeked of  
pot.  
  
"Greg?" called Alice "I'm here to clean your room."  
  
Greg, in a stoned stuper, sat on his throw pillows, looking like a dumbass,  
bowl in hand. "Uh, hi Alice. groovy day isn't it?"  
  
Alice frowned. "Greg. is that what I think it is?"  
  
Greg looked sheepishly at all his paraphenilia scatted on the floor- papers, hitters, bowls, and of course baggies o' grass. "Um, it's for a school project Alice."  
  
Alice held up her hand. "Greg, say no more. All I ask is that you share."  
  
"WHAT?" cried Greg  
  
"Oh come on, you honestly don't think I'm naturally this happy about being an old, unmarried, housekeeper do you?"  
  
Greg relaxed a little. "Uh.."  
  
"Just give me a few hits, and my lips are sealed."  
  
Greg stuffed the pipe again, and Alice held it to her lips, lit it and inhaled. Greg was impressed at how long Alice could hold her smoke.  
  
"Shit, Alice. I never knew." He said.  
  
Alice smiled seductively. "I am a woman of many secrets." She took a few more tokes and handed the pipe back to Greg. "By the way, I have a full sized bong in my room that you are welcome to use whenever you want. Marcia and the others too."  
  
"Thanks!" said Greg "Although I may have to cut back. this shit is getting to expensive and the guy who sells it to me is going off to school soon."  
  
"Ah, never fear!" said Alice "Sam grows the shit, side business you know, I'm sure he'll cut you a real good deal."  
  
"Oh Alice!" said Greg "You are far out!"  
  
Alice gave a little moo of pleasure. "I sure am Greg..I am really fucked up man!"  
  
And with that she picked up her dustrag and went back downstairs, to get her own stash of Hash and celebrate her discovery in privacy. Greg's secret was safe. 


	3. Marcia and Greg Get it On

** I decided to take a different twist on this chapter. Enjoy.  
  
It was a Sunday afternoon, and the sun was shining at the Brady house, because of course, the sun is ALWAYS shining at the Brady's. Greg Brady was sitting up in his groovy attic, smoking as usual. He had been smoking all day, and by this point was totally shit-faced. He wanted Marcia. He was plotting to get her up into his room and getting her stoned so he could get it on with her. He opened his door and yelled down the stairs:  
  
"MARCIA! Get your ass up here!"  
  
"Hold on you shit hole, I'm putting new batteries in my vibrator!".  
  
The thought of Marcia fucking a piece of flesh colored plastic instead of him made Greg mad. He could feel his high waning, so he went back upstairs and took a few more hits of his pipe.  
  
"What do you want?" Marcia was at the top of the stairs  
  
Greg could feel his sausage throbbing in his pants. "Just wanted to know if you want to smoke, that's all."  
  
"Oh. Sure why not- I'm always up for the greenery!"  
  
Sure enough, after about an hour of smoking Marcia was fucked up. But this point Greg thought his dick was going to explode out of his bell- bottoms. He put his arm around Marcia.  
  
"You know, Marsh, that skirt looks really groovy on you."  
  
"Really? Thanks Greg."  
  
"Yeah, why don't you let me take it off you so I can look at it closer."  
  
Marcia giggled. "Oh Greg, if you want to fuck you could just say so!"  
  
Marcia whipped off her clothes, and Greg threw himself on her. The two were just getting hot and heavy, when Marcia said-  
  
"Greg take it out for a minute while you, I want to put my charm bracelet on the table so it doesn't get caught".  
Greg tried to pull his winkie out of her. He pulled and pulled, grunting from the strain, but he couldn't get it out.  
  
"Shit!" he said "It's stuck"  
  
"WHAT?!? What the fuck do you mean it's stuck?!?"  
  
"I don't know! I guess I'm just too much man Marcia."  
  
"Well I don't care what the fuck you are, if you can't get it out I'm gonna cut it off!"  
  
Marcia grabbed his ding-dong with both her hands pulled as hard as she could. His thingy popped out, and sent Marcia flying across the room from the force. Her naked body lay in a heap against the window. Pulling herself up, she fixed her hair.  
  
"God dammit Greg! I'm going to get tangles because of you! Keep your fucking dick out of me from now on!"  
  
Greg was rolling on the bed laughing at the sight of Marcia flying naked across the room.  
  
"Hey whatever man, it's not much fault its too big to fit there. Now go away, I want to smoke my pot."  
  
So Marcia put on her clothes back on and left Greg in peace to smoke his weed and dream about Marcia's naked body flying across the room. 


End file.
